“Cool Couple of Days”

I had my lesson Monday night. My professor had god things to say about my piece, basically summing up that I’m finished if I think I am. He had a couple suggestions for additional material at the end, but said it was up to me. I promised him I’d look at seeing if I could make his ideas work.

He also gave me some props on a good first semester, complimented my writing, and mentioned how prolific I’ve been. That one was nice to hear again. It’s something my undergrad composition professor first noticed about me when I was doing my bachelors. He asked about my seminar and we chatted about my paper, about Wagner and Debussy and that pivot from the romantic era to the modern era. I told him that my other professor had been very complimentary of my writing and he said that’s a very good thing.

So it would seem that I really am doing well. Kind of funny how I don’t quite trust that. Maybe that’s something to talk with the therapist about.

I’ve also been spending more time on the phone with The Goddess, and I think I’m changing my mind there. I’m a little concerned about something a former therapist said to me once—that I need a partner not a project. But we’re all of us under construction to some degree. What’s important is that I not date someone with the purpose of making them a project. Like that old thinking I used to have where I’d meet someone and think about how if this thing about them changed, and if they just did that, etc. etc. then they’d be perfect for me. I don’t feel that happening this time. The Goddess has her struggles, but I feel acceptance about that. Not that she’s got to get her shit together, just acceptance about where she is in life. At least that’s how it seems to me today; I hope it’s actually true.

I’ve done some shopping. I got a new jacket—my god I’ve been needing a new jacket for so long I don’t remember. I also ordered a couple pairs of shoes. After dealing with shitty shoes for a few years, I decided it was worth it to me to spend the money and buy some good pairs. So I’ve got back to the Doc Martens. Yea :) I ordered a pair for everyday casual use, and I also ordered this amazingly cool pair that’s like oxford wingtips, except they’ve got the doc sole. Righteous. Can’t wait for those to show up.